"We'll Be Late. We're Done!" (12/1/04)
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Okay, so Apple admits that it's a little late to the party: following yesterday's observation that the iTunes Music Store didn't make it to Canada by the end of November as promised, the company issued a statement to MacMinute and other Apple-obsessed news outlets confirming that the store really was late and not simply invisible or cleverly hiding behind the toolshed or something. "We said that we would launch the iTunes Music Store in Canada by the end of November, but we're going to miss this deadline by a bit," said Apple. Fair enough. So how long's "a bit," we all ask? "You'll hear from us very soon," they reply. Hmmmmmm.

We know those statements were meant to be reassuring, but if we were tune-starved Canadians with a fistful of loonies burning a hole in our pocket, we think we'd find them to be anything but. On the contrary, vague, open-ended quantities like "a bit" and "very soon" would have us twitching uncontrollably while picturing a store launch ten minutes after Buck Rogers meets Twiki. Faithful viewer zmapper reminds us that Mac OS Rumors reported last Sunday that iTMS Canada "might not be ready until the new year due to some licensing agreements which don't go into effect until midnight (A.M.) on January 1 2005," which is "only" a month away, and even that scenario would have us crawling the walls in near-terminal impatience.

After all, Apple said November. November is over. So if you're a Canadian at the end of his or her tether (say, nice tether!), we totally understand where you're coming from. It's been over a year and a half since the iTMS first appeared in the States; it could have walked from Cupertino to Toronto by now. So where the H-E-double-hockey-sticks is it?

Well, we can't really speak for Apple, you understand, but we expect its response would be something along the lines of "we gotcher Canadian iTMS right here, buddy!" Earlier today, Mac Rumors cited an "inside source" who claimed that the launch would take place on December 1st, and as faithful viewer Jon Slaton first pointed out, so it has. That's right, kids, if you click "Choose Store" on the iTMS home page in iTunes, you'll find that there's now a maple leaf nestled smugly among the Shiny Flag Buttons of Many Lands. (Frankly, we're a little puzzled why Apple bothered with the statement to the press at all, since "soon" evidently meant "in about twelve hours' time"-- but hey, whatever.) So get a-spendin', guys, because instant gratification has finally come to the Great White North.

On top of that, Canucks get a little compensation for having had to wait for so long: songs at the Canadian iTMS are just 99 cents in local currency, which is less than 84 cents in what we so irritatingly insist on calling "real money" and less than anyone else pays per song in the world. So now, alongside the curling, the health care, and the geographical convenience of stalking Degrassi stars, there's one more benefit of living in Canada: cheap downloadable tunes. And if you're panicking because now you can't complain about your lack of a local iTMS anymore, don't worry-- you've got at least a good six months left in which to complain about the lack of Apple retail stores!

In the meantime, what'll the rest of us complain about, you ask? Well, there's still no iTMS in Ireland; does that count?


 
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far


 

The above scene was taken from the 12/1/04 episode:

December 1, 2004: The iTMS Canada is finally here-- and only a day late, to boot. Meanwhile, the iTMS UK sells the Band Aid 20 song after all (at great cost to itself), and in some Asian countries, the iPod has a market share only a mother could love...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 5073: Everybody Wins, Mostly (12/1/04)   While we're on the subject of sudden satisfactory resolutions to recent iTunes Music Store drama, remember all that kerfuffle over the iTMS UK "refusing" to sell the new Band Aid 20 version of "Do They Know It's Christmas?"...

  • 5074: Foreign Cultures Are Scary (12/1/04)   Perspective time! You are, of course, well aware that the iPod reigns supreme when it comes to market share among portable digital music players, and so you might be questioning the necessity of Apple's rumored decision to ship cheaper, lower-capacity flash-based iPods starting next month just to compete in the shallowest end of the pool...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

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