Don't Expect A Tip, Either (7/29/03)
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"Hey, AtAT," you ask, "just where the Galvin are those new PowerBooks that everyone's been waiting for since June's price cut?" Well, it's funny that you should take the Chris's name in vain, there, Binky. True, Mac fans have been waiting for new 12- and 15-inch PowerBooks ever since that inventory-clearing price reduction showed up almost two months ago-- and technically, we've all been waiting for the 15-incher for far longer, i.e. ever since the first aluminum PowerBooks surfaced in January and suddenly made titanium passé. Frankly, we were pretty puzzled, too, since we would have figured on at least the 15-incher having shown up by now.

So what's the hold-up? Believe it or not, according to AppleInsider, Apple has been swatted in the hinder by yet another Motorola production shortage. Yes, folks, it's all well and good to hang your hopes on IBM as the company that's going to develop kick-ass PowerPCs and actually deliver them 1) in quantity and 2) on time, but sadly, the transition can't happen overnight. In the meantime, Apple is still frighteningly dependent on Motorola to supply G4s to stick into PowerBooks, eMacs, and iMacs-- and word has it that Steve and company are still waiting for a big order of chips with an original promised delivery date of "mid-May"-- an order which now officially qualifies as "Later Than Kilborn." What, no "30 minutes or it's free" guarantee? Yeesh. Let's hope that when they finally show up, those chips at least come with an extra order of Crazy Bread.

Meanwhile, Apple allegedly has revised 12- and 15-inch PowerBooks ready and waiting, packed to the gills with everything but an actual processor inside. (We bet they'd make you a sweet deal on one if you're interested.) These puppies were supposedly targeted for a WWDC intro, then pushed back to a Macworld CreativePro release, and are now listed internally at Apple as shipping "sometime before intelligent apes enslave mankind and the Statue of Liberty is mostly buried and all slanty." Reportedly Apple has been planning to pop faster G4s in the iMacs, too, which are also overdue for a little pick-me-up, but until Motorola comes through with the goods, that's a no-go as well.

Steve is said to be "irate" about the hold-up to the degree that he "often uses profanity when expressing his displeasure with the semiconductor sector of Motorola." Gee, is that all? We hear that Mr. Mercurial often uses profanity when expressing his displeasure with the fact that unwrapping a Jolly Rancher occasionally leaves little bits of plastic on the candy, so if the G4 shortage hasn't prompted at least three murderous rampages in highly-populated areas, maybe he's mellowing with age. Or maybe if those G4s don't turn up in another week or so, Motorola's headquarters will be mysteriously reduced to a smoking hole in the ground...


 
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far


 

The above scene was taken from the 7/29/03 episode:

July 29, 2003: Rumors swirl that the continued lack of new PowerBooks is all Motorola's fault. Meanwhile, customers and artists alike continue to discover new and exciting reasons to despise BuyMusic.com, and while dual-processor Power Mac G5s may be delayed until late September, at least Panther appears to provide an alternative to the brushed metal Finder...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 4106: A Solid Week Of Lameness (7/29/03)   Why, what's this? Still more evidence that BuyMusic.com sucks? You betcha, folks-- it just keeps coming, wave after wave of it, unceasing and endless just like those bug-looking swoopy alien things in Galaga...

  • 4107: Brushed Metal Madness (7/29/03)   The masses have spoken, and generally speaking, while they would love some brushed metal on their desktops, they don't want it anywhere near their Finder. (Okay, technically we don't think the Power Mac G5 enclosure is brushed metal, but hey, cut us a little slack.)...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

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I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

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