TV-PGDecember 3, 2001: Apple officially announces stores number 25 and 26- and inadvertently reveals store 27 right around the corner. (Um, our corner.) Meanwhile, G5 rumors go kablooey with the craziness and the contradictions and the hey hey hey and the nice LAAAAA-dy, and Apple (mostly) wins a deal to sell some 38,000 iBooks to the state of Maine...
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 
Retail, Retail Everywhere (12/3/01)
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You'd think we'd be bored with all of this retail hoo-haa by now, and believe us-- we're as shocked as you are that the ongoing Apple grand openings can still get us all charged up. After all, it's not exactly "A-list" material anymore; whereas the earliest store openings prompted the Mac-centric media to publish week-long sneak previews of the blessed event (complete with artists' renditions of the predicted interior, innumerable photos of the dumpsters outside, and incisive interviews with the mall janitorial staff), these days a grand opening is more likely to win little more than an obligatory blurb beneath the day's shareware release listings. Luckily, the fans aren't yet as jaded as the press, and people (though fewer of them) are still lining up to see the latest local slice of Mac heaven-- as depicted in faithful viewer Matthew Shull's photos of last Saturday's grand opening in Clarendon, for example.

So, yes, every time a new store or three throws open its doors, if we're not physically there and cheering in line, we're usually frantically reloading Apple's retail page, anxiously waiting to see where the next stores will be opening. We're pleased to note that, yes, there are two more waiting in the wings; while no date is yet posted, it's a pretty safe bet to say that this coming weekend heralds the magic day for Apple's Palisades and Rockingham Park locations, both "coming soon" (in West Nyack, New York and Salem, New Hampshire, respectively). If you're near either of those two stores, clear your calendars and start warming up your waiting-in-line muscles.

As it turns out, this particular announcement has us juiced even more than usual, because the Rockingham Park store is only about 35 miles away from the AtAT compound-- just ten miles further away than our current "local" Apple store at the Northshore Mall, and-- more to the point-- just across the border in sunny tax-free New Hampshire. That means if we're ever seized with the notion to drop a couple of grand on a new Mac, we can save ourselves a hundred bucks or so by going the New Hampshire route. It's just one more thing to pick up on those traditional Bostonian runs up north: a few cases of liquor, a couple of tattoos, and a Quicksilver Power Mac. (Actually, we don't drink, and Massachusetts marched boldly into the 18th century on the whole tattoo issue recently, so we can now get ink locally. But there's a tradition to preserve, here.)

But wait, it gets even better... well, for us, at least. Faithful viewer David Nagler was poking around Apple's site and discovered that the page for the long-awaited CambridgeSide store has quietly gone live, though it's yet unlinked at the main retail page. (Incidentally, if anyone at Apple happens to be listening, the city name is "Cambridge," not "CambridgeSide"-- see the address at the CambridgeSide Galleria site.) That hints strongly at an opening in less than two weeks, which is fantastic news... not only because that store was originally supposed to have opened back when pet rocks were all the rage, but also because the Galleria happens to be just eight miles from our front door, making it a real "local" Apple store. But don't get us wrong-- we're not gloating, or anything. We're just mentioning. Casually. Offhandedly. And with huge frickin' grins on our faces.

 
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The G5: All We Almost Know (12/3/01)
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So what mood are you in: reckless optimism, or cautious skepticism? Because we've got something for everyone, today. If you feel like continuing the headlong plunge into the rampant G5 frenzy that currently has a sizeable portion of the Mac community foaming at the mouth, be our guests-- and go check out the recent articles at Architosh that faithful viewer William Bonde sent us. There's some special stuff in the latest, which notes Motorola's very own published PowerPC roadmap (just posted last Friday) and specifically what it has to say about the G5 architecture. If you're one of the folks nervously clutching your credit cards in anticipation of amassing great debt come next month's anticipated Stevenote G5 introduction, surely you'll drool ever harder at Motorola's mention of "RapidIO Interconnect Architecture," "0.13 micron process with SOI," and speeds of "800 MHz to 2 GHz+."

What's more, Architosh also has another article which will, if anything, give your salivary glands even more of a workout. (Remember to stay hydrated.) Reportedly Apple will "trounce PCs in 2002" performance-wise; Architosh repeats much of what we've all heard before-- such as that January's G5s will ship at "only" 1.4 GHz (or perhaps 1.6)-- but definitely contributes some new juice about the other nuts and bolts under the hood of these mysterious Power Mac G5s. In addition to the previously-rumored 400 MHz bus, Architosh has "adequate reason to suspect" that Apple's next Power Macs will boast graphics acceleration (courtesy of that Raycer buyout a couple of years back) that can boost some functions by "10x - 20x." Meanwhile, Architosh also believes that Gigawire (widely held to be Apple's name for the double-bandwidth FireWire 2) is actually "a technology that allows plug-and-play clustering" of the new systems for massive parallel processing capabilities.

Okay, time to reel those tongues back in; if you just want a slight tug back to earth, Architosh entreats its readers not to be "surprised if Power Mac G5s don't show up at San Francisco." But if you're in the mood for a far more significant downer, look no further than Think Secret; faithful viewer Jef Van der Voort notes that today that site is flat-out predicting that there will be "no true G5 Power Mac" at the next Stevenote-- although there will be a new Power Mac joining Steve onstage. Confused?

Don't be. See, Think Secret is dishing the most pessimistic dirt we've yet unearthed on this subject, stating that while we will indeed get a new professional desktop Mac next month (complete with 266 MHz DDR RAM, "upgraded" FireWire, and maybe a better software bundle), it'll "just" be a new G4 and not a G5 as everyone is expecting. The chip at the heart of these otherwise spiffy new Macs is said to be a PowerPC 7460, more widely known as the "Apollo" G4. Of course, that's not necessarily a real problem, as these new G4s are indeed still expected to ship at up to 1.4 GHz as we've all been hearing; they just won't actually be G5s.

Got that? Well, hang on a minute, because faithful viewer MacSawdust just pointed out that The Register has decided to make everything as clear as brick by building upon a little scenario that the Naked Mole Rat first broached about a month ago: namely, that there is a Power Mac G5 headed our way, but the "G5" chip that Apple may be putting into the "Power Mac G5" may in fact just be a G4 after all. In other words, Apple's marketing team said, "Hey, this new Apollo G4 processor sure is zippy-- and it's finally running at clock speeds greater than 1 GHz. Why don't we just call it the G5?" Of course, The Reg isn't actually sure whether or not this actually happened.

So there you have it: every single fact (sort of) known about the upcoming Power Macs. They may or may not be coming next month, they may or may not be Power Mac G5s, and if they are, they may or may not actually have G5 chips inside them. Now that everything's 100% crystal clear, you can plan your purchasing accordingly. And don't tell us we never did anything for you.

 
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One Down, Forty-Nine To Go (12/3/01)
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Remember back when Apple first rolled out the current iBook design, and Steve announced that the school system of Henrico Country in Virginia had just bought 23,000 of the little white goobers? Remember how that was being touted as the "largest portable computer sale to education ever"? Well, it's time to recalibrate your sense of "largest," because that deal was just the beginning, and today it's starting to look like small potatoes. When Apple said the iBook was its secret weapon to start recapturing lost education market share, it clearly wasn't making idle threats. How, for example, do you suppose Mike Dell feels now that the Maine Department of Education just out-Henrico'd Henrico by about 15,000 units? (We imagine he's making a face sort of like Daffy Duck about five minutes into Duck Amuck, but that's just a hunch.)

Okay, it's important to note that the Maine contract still isn't a done deal; if Apple and Maine are "unsuccessful" at negotiating mutually agreeable terms, then the state may "enter into negotiations with the next highest scoring bidder." However, given how hungry Apple is for market share in the education arena (and how badly we imagine that Steve wants to burn Mike Dell on this deal), we strongly suspect that the company isn't going to let this contract slip away; in fact, we wouldn't be surprised if Maine can manage to squeeze some pretty hefty concessions out of Apple-- free t-shirts?-- just by suddenly flipping through a Dell catalog while at the negotiating table. After all, Apple needs this sale; as faithful viewer Lykle pointed out, MacInTouch indicates that the deal is worth "38,600 iBooks" at a cost of $43 million.

That is, if we may say so, a big honkin' motherlode of consumer portables-- and indeed it has to be, because Maine wants one for every single seventh- and eighth-grade student and teacher in the whole blessed state. Think of it: an entire state's worth of public middle schools, all using Macs. That's precisely the kind of coup that Apple needs to pull off to get squarely back into the game; kudos to the company for (so far) pulling it off. Oh, and all you junior high Mac fans out there: it may be time to consider asking your parents if they'd mind moving to the upper reaches of New England for at least a year or two. Sure, the winters are occasionally a little challenging, but hey-- free iBook.

 
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