TV-PGJanuary 31, 2001: ATI is getting the boot-- but it'll take over a year for nVIDIA to take its place. Meanwhile, Mike Dell finally catches up to Bill Gates and echoes Steve's "PC as digital hub" sentiments, and Ted Waitt pulls a Jobs himself, as he returns to Gateway to try to save the faltering company...
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 
The Long, Slow Good-Bye (1/31/01)
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The other shoe has finally dropped-- though it'll take over a year for it to hit the ground. It's no secret that Apple (meaning Steve Jobs) has been less than thrilled with OEM graphics chip supplier ATI for some time now. Between slow, crash-prone Mac drivers and some hefty technology lag when it comes to bringing new chipsets to our humble platform of choice, ATI already had a couple of strikes against it. That's when things got really ugly: ATI accidentally spilled the beans about some new Macs a couple of days before Steve was scheduled to unveil them at last July's Macworld Expo, thus spoiling the iCEO's big surprise. And we all know how much Steve loves his surprises-- and how painful his Nasty Spiny Vengeance can be.

Much was made (largely by us, naturally) about the ensuing disappearance of any trace of ATI's new RADEON chipset from Steve's keynote and the products on display at Apple's booth. Yes, it's possible that, in a snit-fit, Steve banished the RADEON to Mac limbo for a few more weeks as ATI's punishment for wrecking his fun. Of course, the more mundane explanation is that some last-minute show-stopper bugs cropped up in the RADEON and Steve had no choice but to surgically remove all references to it from his speech. Either way, things didn't bode well for ATI's future as Apple's sole GPU supplier. And when most of the new Power Macs surfaced six months later packing nVIDIA GeForce2 MX cards (with the RADEON relegated to "BTO option" status), rumors that ATI had "Buh-bye" tattooed on its forehead suddenly started to carry a whole lotta weight.

What AppleInsider claims (as faithful viewer and AtAT mainstay David Triska notes) is that, despite the fact that currently only three of Apple's fourteen stock Mac configurations ship with nVIDIA graphics instead of ATI technology, nVIDIA is in and ATI is being shown the door-- there's just a really long hallway to the exit, is all. Reportedly Apple (again, probably meaning Steve) would love to have every Mac running with nVIDIA chips right now, but unfortunately, changing GPUs mid-stream seems akin to turning an ocean liner around; it takes a while for anything to happen. Apple's having an easier time assimilating nVIDIA's desktop chips, hence the existing Power Macs and-- allegedly-- the imminent nVIDIA-powered iMacs. However, mobile chipsets are proving more challenging; the next PowerBook G4 revision will apparently include a new nVIDIA-friendly 4x AGP motherboard, so look for ATI to exit the PowerBook's good graces next winter-- but the iBook won't make the jump to nVIDIA until "sometime next year." No word on the Cube, but we'd have to guess it'll go nVIDIA sooner rather than later.

All told, assuming this whole nVIDIA switchover started sometime last July (if not earlier), it sounds like the transition will take well over a year and a half to complete. Say what you will about Steve, but the man sure is patient about exacting his revenge. Here's hoping nVIDIA doesn't go blabbing about unannounced Apple products three days before Macworld Expo San Francisco 2002, because switching to yet another supplier would be more slow-motion than we could handle.

 
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Steves, Steves Everywhere (1/31/01)
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We know what you've been thinking: if Steve delivered his "the personal computer is not dead / the personal computer as digital hub" keynote on the 9th, and Bill Gates made his suspiciously similar "the personal computer is not dead / the personal computer as digital core" speech this past Monday, just where the heck is Mike Dell? Mike, as we are all painfully aware, is afflicted with one big honkin' case of Steveitis; the man is obsessed, to occasionally dangerous degrees. If anyone should be ripping off Steve's last keynote, it's Mr. Dell-- but so far, nothing.

Fear not, true believers! Faithful viewer Pastor Mac reveals the truth: Mike has been trying really hard to ape Steve's sentiments in public ever since the Expo, but he was evidently having some trouble getting anyone to listen. We hear that CNN never returned his calls, MSNBC eventually changed its phone numbers, and Business Week went so far as to take out a restraining order. It was at that point that Mike resorted to talking about digital hubs to people waiting in line at various fast food restaurants. After getting really tired of hearing Dell yammer on endlessly about the PC's continued viability as the integrating center of the modern consumer's digital lifestyle, the guy working the counter at Mike's local Taco Bell finally suggested that he tell it to somebody overseas. That's when Mike caught a jet to London.

Yes, according to The Register, Mike finally found a willing audience on the other side of the pond, and he was finally free to expound on how "the PC will remain central to people's lives" and how it can assume the role as "the center of an entertainment system." And while The Register's coverage might sting a bit (being called "not a visionary by any stretch of the imagination" can't be too enabling of Mike's Steve complex), at least he finally got to strut some of Steve's moves in front of a crowd-- and with the press present, no less. We have to admit it: his endearing antics have sort of grown on us over the years, so we're actually glad he's doing what makes him happy, bless his sick little heart.

 
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Stevulation: All The Rage (1/31/01)
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While both Bill Gates and Mike Dell are wowing crowds in Europe with their well-choreographed Steve Jobs impressions, the love doesn't stop there. Evidently Mr. Dell is a trend-setter in the high-tech industry, because Steve emulation seems to be all the rage these days. The latest bigwig to get fitted for a black turtleneck? According to faithful viewer EMan, it's one Ted Waitt, the ex-CEO of Gateway-- or should we say, ex-ex-CEO. As reported by ZDNet News, Mr. Waitt has "pulled a Steve" in a far different fashion than both Gates and Dell; instead of copying his strategies, product designs, or speeches, Ted is following in Steve's footsteps by returning to the beleaguered computer company he once ran in hopes of pulling off an impressive turnaround.

Gateway, currently battling "disappointing earnings statements, layoffs, and a plummeting stock price," bears at least a superficial resemblance to Apple just prior to the Second Jobs Dynasty. (Actually, it doesn't sound all that different from today's Apple, come to think of it-- but we digress.) Of course, Gateway's scenario lacks some of the epic grandeur of Apple's fairy tale struggle back from the brink of disaster. For one thing, Gateway isn't suffering too much worse than the rest of the industry right now, while in 1996 Apple lost about a billion dollars and looked ready for the scrap heap. For another, whereas Steve cofounded Apple in a garage, was ousted by a man he hired, and returned only after twelve years of wandering the desert, Waitt left only a year ago-- of his own accord. So Gateway's story is sort of a less majestic, less dramatic Reader's Digest version of the Apple story. (There's also the fact that Waitt still has to accomplish his happy ending.)

Despite the differences, though, it's tough to ignore the basic "CEO Returns To Save Floundering Personal Computer Company" angle. It's nice to see that Steve's appeal is starting to spread within the high-tech CEO community. Why, we wouldn't be surprised if next week Mike Capellas was spotted wandering the halls of Compaq barefoot and wearing cut-offs...

 
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